That they may all be one

John 17:20-21

“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.”

Today is Maundy Thursday, when the Church throughout the world remembers Jesus instating the sacrament of Communion, the washing of the disciples’ feet, and the prayers of our Lord in the garden before his arrest.  For some of us, tonight is the first of many long, beautiful, and sometimes sweetly agonizing services in which we enter into the suffering of the Christ and in a small way walk through it with him.  In a few days we will celebrate his resurrection, his victory over death itself which he will share with us as his brothers and sisters.

I could stop here and encourage you to dwell on these facts, but I know that most of my readers will be doing that under much better guidance than mine over the next few days.  So instead, I will take a few moments to dwell on the Lord’s prayer in the garden in light of our times.

I have made it very clear that I am simply a layman, that I hold no authority and make no claims to it.  But the prayer quoted above has burned my heart for years, and I often find it difficult not to be prescriptive when I talk about church unity.  So please bear with me and forgive me if I step outside of what is appropriate.  In the hopes of not doing this, I will try to focus my thoughts as much as possible on myself.

This year is one of the rare years in which the East and the West celebrate this feast at the same time (Easter, Pascha, Resurrection Day, whatever you want to call it).  I am delighted that we celebrate them together this year, but it also highlights to me the fact that this occurrence is rare.  Nearly a thousand years ago the East and the West split.  This division is beginning to be mended.  Around five hundred years ago the Church in the West shattered, and the splintering continues.  We divided over ideological differences, political differences, and sometimes very slight doctrinal differences.  I am not going to place blame in this post, though my friends have heard me at various times lash out at one or another party involved in the split.

It cannot be denied that Jesus desires unity among his people.  It cannot be denied that the world looks at us as representatives of Christ, even if we do not look at ourselves as such.  When we sow division, when we perpetuate division, even when we are satisfied with division, the world sees this and forms an opinion.  Generally the opinion is that Christians are no different from any other group of people, willing to let petty differences separate us and drive us into warring factions.  It says to the world that God did not send Jesus.

This fact in itself is devastating.

Many of us come from fractured families.  One parent or another may be estranged, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins may be out of the picture.  Not because of death, but because we simply do not speak anymore.  Personally, I haven’t spoken to most of my extended family in about ten years, and it isn’t likely to change in the near future.  This isn’t something I’m happy about.  At best it’s something I’ve learned to cope with.  But as time goes on, the pain of being divided lessens until eventually it doesn’t hurt.  It is simply the way things are.  And since we have lived our lives without one another for so long, when we do speak there simply isn’t much for us to say to one another.  We have truly become separate, we have become entirely different families, despite the fact that we share a common blood.

For most Christians, the division in the Church isn’t something to mourn.  It isn’t something we’re even aware of, often.  But we reveal ourselves by asking questions of other Christians like “What religion are you?”  We fail to recognize our commonality.  We don’t even recognize it when it is pointed out.  Or we simply don’t care.  In some cases we even celebrate our division, being glad that we don’t have to share a cup with those sinners that refuse to have guitars in worship, or who try to make sense of the mystery of the Sacrament by describing it in words other than those that we use.  Our divided family gives us a sense of pleasure, knowing that we are right and our brother is wrong.  We focus on the right and wrong, completely ignoring the fact that he is our brother.

I am not proposing an overall solution to the unity problem.  That isn’t my job.  Though if I can offer a solution that I know will be approved by every authority to begin to address this problem, it is that we must all pray for unity.  The Lord prayed for unity as one of his last acts in the world, while he was tormented to the point of sweating blood.  We can join him in praying.  And as we pray for the unity of the Church, we can also pray for the Lord to mold our own hearts, to make us truly desire this unity.

This was a very long introduction to the personal reflection.  So let me turn my attention away from the description of problem to the ways in which I perpetuate the problem.

Gossip.  Disrespect.  Lack of empathy.  Self-righteousness.  Considering myself better than others.  Keeping record of wrongs.

I grew up in the church.  Given my particular household, I grew up in the midst of all the politics and divisions that exist in any group of churches.  I saw all the dirty laundry.  At times, I was the recipient of the hurt that a church can cause.  More significantly, my family received it while I watched.  I have seen the damage that a church can do, and my heart has been broken.  For years I refused to be involved in the denomination, and any references to it made me disproportionately angry.  While I can now, thanks to the grace and healing of God, worship with people from this denomination, there is still a division there.  They aren’t the ones keeping it alive.

When I was younger and more arrogant, I threw myself into theology.  Being blessed with reason I formed opinions based on what I read.  I put so much weight on my opinions that I insisted other people agree with me.  I even went so far as to tell some that any other opinion was not actually Christianity.  (If any of you are reading this and I have not seen you to apologize, I am deeply sorry.)  Since growing up, I have seen my error.  But now I have a new set of opinions, and my inclination is still to believe that my angle is correct.  When I sit at table, when I share the cup, with those who hold a different view, it is difficult for me to set aside the fact that we do not see things the same way.  I still believe that I am approaching things correctly and they are not.  I want to insist that they see things from my angle.  It is difficult for me to accept that what has been important for me in my journey with and toward Christ has not been important for them.

I am prone to ranting.  I will air my frustration about one group of Christians to my friends without concern for loving my brother.  I spend more time degrading my brother than I do dignifying him.  And yet I insist on patience from others when they bring up the logs in my eye.

While in my heart I long for unity, in my actions I drive the wedges deeper.  Even when I am among my brothers and sisters who worship our Lord through different words, different rituals, or a different understanding, I am often not with them.  We worship next to each other, but not together.

And so, for the sake of the Body, I must pray.  Pray for the unity of the Church, but also fervently that God would mold my heart to truly desire it.

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.